The Right is Dark and Full of Terrors

**Game of Thrones and Trump Inauguration spoilers**

As I watched the inauguration I couldn’t help but be reminded of a similar ominous tone from the Game of Thrones finale last summer. Much like Obama, Tommen’s time in power ended too soon. Now both have been replaced by widely controversial successors with questionable ethics. The season six finale ended with Cersei finally ascending to the Iron Throne. As of today, Donald Trump was sworn into our nation’s highest office with an equally grim expression. Shame!

That face you make when you said you wanted the big job, got it, then realize it was better when you were hiding in your tower, counting money and scoffing peasants. Sad! 

By the time Trump finished his inaugural address, I was increasingly unsure if I was looking at Washington or Westeros. Maybe it was all the Inauguration Day drinking games, but I could barely tell the difference.

Congratulations to CNN for producing your first almost HBO-worthy content. 

As coverage went on, more parallels emerged between key players for the Iron Throne and those we know in Washington. The night is certainly dark and full of terrors, let’s just hope President Trump doesn’t turn into a Mad King.

(Former) President Barack Obama | Red Woman

Boy, bye. In addition to rapidly aging before our eyes, both made departures that left us nervously wondering when we will see them again. Melissandre dashed out on a horseback sensing her time had come to an end while Obama ascended in a helicopter earlier today after transferring power for a well-earned vacation. No doubt both these figures will have important roles next time we see them, so hopefully their returns are not too far off.

(Former First) Lady Michelle | Lady Olenna

That RBF Tho!! There was no need to worry about getting out of the sun during Trump’s Inauguration, Michelle Obama brought enough shade for everyone. The former First Lady, much like Lady Olenna, has garnered a reputation for Power Resting Bitch Face. Between the expression she made while receiving a gift from Melania or reacting to Trump’s speech, it’s impressive she didn’t lose it for a moment and call someone a browbeaten bookworm or a shoeless zealot.

Vice President Mike Pence | Petyr “Littlefinger” Baelish 

Still waters run deep. Don’t let their calm demeanors fool you. The VP debate in October made one thing clear – Pence was not running for Vice President, he was running for President in 2020. Both men share a self serving desire for greatness through use of a soft, calming voice to throw off allies and enemies alike. Both see their current position as a mere stepping stone in the long run. Let’s watch out for these two.

“Chaos isnt a pit. Chaos is a ladder.” – Littlefinger

Eric Trump | Joffrey Baratheon

You son of a king. I know Joffrey has been gone for a while, just go with me here about the two rich, entitled sons of powerful men. There’s something about both their creepy smiles that give me the feeling I dont want to be locked alone in a room with either one. Maybe this is why Eric stole a drink from In-N-Out burger in L.A., because any drink specifically given to him might lead to a similar end as his Baratheon counterpart. One thing that differs is that we know a Trump doesn’t always pay his debts.

Paul Ryan | Septa Unella

Ah, how the mighty have fallen. These are faces of those in former power now with their hands tied behind their back. Each used their power to attempt to weaken Trump and Cersei respectively, thinking they were both beyond gaining any more power. We can count on watching both Ryan and Unella grovel for forgiveness in the future, partially as a result of their enemy’s affection for waterboarding.

Vladimir Putin | Daenerys Targaryen

Ride it, my pony. I know this one seems pretty obvious with their shared “naked with a horse” tendencies. Even more importantly is the vuluernability of our countries against arguably stronger foreign leaders, both of whom will stop at nothing to get the power they want. We are not sure what these two are capable of, but we know they could really shake up our shit moving forward. Do the respective new rulers, or any of us, even stand a chance?


While we still have seven months of mystery until we find out Cersei’s plans as Ruler of Westeros, Trump’s inaugural speech outlined a clear 100 day plan that includes repealing Obamacare, increasing border security and limiting international trade.

As far as America goes, winter has finally arrived and it looks like it will last at least four years. Even with the separation of Church and State, all we can do is pray to the Old Gods and The New.